MY FEETS WERE STAINED BY BEETS

I decided to get some eats,
So, I opened a can of beets,
I spilled the juice,
It ran real loose,
And, stained purple my bare feets.     

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TIN FOIL HAT PEOPLE NEED HELP

I ran out of tin foil, now the state owns my brain,

With no shinny tin hat, I'm completely insane,

To remember what's true,

On my tongue I must chew,

To keep my mind clear, I must suffer great pain.

Warning:  Don't try this at home. It hurts.

Tiger, Tiger brush your teeth

Tiger, tiger don't eat my kite,

Or I'll whoop you in a fight,

Make sure your teeth are sharp and white,

When they rip my flesh tonight,

Do it fast because time is tight,

Gotta catch the bus at dawn's first light.

BENNY HAD TO TAKE A PEA

Benny had to take a pea,

Out of a pea poddy

He needed the form,

Twas a pea corn born norm,

So he could bounce it off a tree.

UNDER THE YIM YONG TREE

Under the yim yong tree I and my dear love matted some grass,

That's where we did picnic and drank from a thermos lined with glass,

And the yim yong fruits,

Made a day full of hoots,

And an evening of toots,

Then after our pipes burned off most of the gas,

We got tired and into dreams we did pass.

A PIG NAMED MORTIE

There was a very big pig named Mortie,
He was depressed because he turned forty,
He ate cottage cheese and cheddar,
The cheese made Mortie feel better,
But, the cheese made his skin all warty.

Mortie was an unhappy pig,
His head was small and his belly big,
He tried to loose weight,
But, fat was his fate,
So, he made his head large with a wig.