THE PEEP CREEPS ARE COMING

The thing about the marshmallow peeps,

When I'm shopping them, I shop for keeps,

The day that comes after Sunday,

Is the day they call Monday,

When they mark down the peeps for us creeps.

THE VOLES ARE COMING

My home has been overrun by cruel voles,

The cruel voles have nefarious goals,

They have a bear army,

Most vicious, not charmy,

Seizing my hen house, while harvesting souls.

AI GAVE ME FAT THIGHS

I ordered from an AI, my dinner online,

The AI took my order and I thought all was fine,

I ordered chicken and fries,

Got pancakes and fried thighs,

I think the AI should stop sampling the wine.

THE DOG POX DARE

When I lie I get an ache in my tooth,

But I can't stand to tell ma the truth,

It wasn't a foul fox,

That gave my brother the pox,

It was when he kissed my dog Hermes, on a dare.💋🐶

MY NEIGHBOR'S CHICKEN OH GOOD GRIEF LIMERICK

My neighbor's chicken oh, good grief,

Got in my chicken and ate my beef,

Although two wrongs don't make right,

My food budget is tight,

So, roast chicken was my chosen relief.

 

LITTLE CHICKEN IN MY BACKYARD PARK

Little chicken in my backyard park,
You escaped from farmer with the dark,
You eat bugs and seeds in my petunia bed,
You could be chicken nuggets covered with bread,

Little chicken in my backyard park,
Pecking bugs from the red pine bark,
I hope your foods are really nutritious,
For I think chicken is quite delicious. 

BARNY THE WICCAN

Barny was a practicing wiccan,
His familiar was a farm chicken,
If you want some good luck,
Get the chicken to cluck,
If he don't cluck you'll have some slim pickin'.

SHERRY WAS A BOXED CHICKEN

Sherry my chicken, I put in a box,
To avoid my catching the chickenpox,
The box was an oven,
I broiled her with lovin',
And, garnished her with bright holly hocks.

MY EYE PECKING PET CHICKEN GETS FOILED LIMERICK

My pet chicken liked to peck at my eyes,
And, his pecking gave me so many cries,
Now, I give him no passes,
I wear safety glasses,
He's foiled but, he always tries.

CHICKEN CAM HAM

There once was a chicken named Cam,
She laid eggs that were all full of ham,
But, the pigs on the farm,
Said ham-eggs did them harm,
So, Cam laid eggs full of blueberry jam.