UNCLE LEE: LOCKED IN FOR POOL

You always knew when Uncle Lee was locked in for pool,

Because he'd purse his pretty lips, and let slip some drool,

Then a victim you would be,

If you took on Uncle Lee,

He'd finish by sinking your balls, and take you to school.

HOMELESS AND LOOKING FOR A STABLE RELATIONSHIP

I'm due to make a house payment, but I've got a fun joke to play,

I'm not going to make the payment, by the scheduled payment day,

I felt real lucky, and of course,

Bet my payment on a quarter horse,

I will try to move into the stable, if the horse says I may.

I LOST MONEY BETTING ON HORSES, NOW I SERVE THEM AT MY PLACE OF EATS

I cook delicious food while listening to music in c minor,

That's why I call my restaurant "The C Minor Diner",

I use to listen to D Major,

Bet on horseys, lost big wager,

I changed my music and my job, because my mate was a major whiner.

A DAYLIGHT SAVINGS POSITIVE RESULT

Now I can golf one more hour,

That gives me some kind of power,

I love to cheat,

To win me an eat,

I just have to remember to shower.

BENNY BET ON C AND BENNY LOST TO ME

Benny use to like to bet,,

He could hit high C on his cornet,

He'd bet he'd vibrate with B,

Then squeal out a D,

Benny owes me much money, yet.