FLYING PIG LIMERICK

Everyone wonders "when pigs fly?,"

I happen to know it’s on the 4th of July,,

They strap on firecrackers that night,

Then, they light them and fly out of sight, 

When the bombs burst bacon falls from the sky. 

  

WHEN DO PIGS FLY?

Everyone wonders when pigs fly,
I happen to know it’s on the 4th of July,,
They strap on firecrackers that night,
Then, they light them and fly out of sight,
So, pigs fly but no one knows why?
 

THE PONY TAIL PIG

A poke-a-dot pig with a long ponytail,
Would dance until the all floor joists would fail,
She went on a long cruise,
For food, dancing and booze,
But, her weight sank the ship before it set sail.

THE NICE PIG NAMED CLANCY

There was a nice pig named Clancy,
He liked to dress up really fancy,
He didn't get a thrill,
By swimming in Swill,
Besides he dated a neat freak named Nancy.

THE POLTERGEIST PIGS

My pigs became poltergeist haunting critters,
They were all determined to give me the jitters,
Because ham and bacon yesterday,
Was their fate for my pay,
But, their haunting I'll shake off with some bitters.

 

FLIPPER THE PIG

THE CULTURAL PIG

Flipper the pig was an odd sort of swine,

He never drank spirits except for French wine,

He listened to Bach,

And easy-listening rock,

While, he complained of pig culture decline.

 

MY PRETTY PET PIG

My pretty pet pig felt so forsaken,
When her boyfriend was sold for back bacon,
I fed her a lunch,
It was bacon,” crunch, crunch”,
She wonders why her heart had been achin’.

THERE ONCE WAS A PIG NAMED SAM

There once was a fat pit named Sam,
He feared he was fattened for ham,
He acted real mean,
To his owner, Colleen,
So, she decided to sell him for Spam.

A PIG NAMED MORTIE

There was a very big pig named Mortie,
He was depressed because he turned forty,
He ate cottage cheese and cheddar,
The cheese made Mortie feel better,
But, the cheese made his skin all warty.

Mortie was an unhappy pig,
His head was small and his belly big,
He tried to loose weight,
But, fat was his fate,
So, he made his head large with a wig.