My grandma said my birthday money was sent directly in the mail,
But, the mailman confessed to stealing it now, he's locked up in the jail,
But, without grandma's money,
My birthday's not sunny,
And, I have no Xbox to play after this tale.
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Sunday, December 11, 2016
Wednesday, December 7, 2016
THE ICE FESTIVAL DID NOT GO WELL
The "Ice Festival" did not go well this year,
I fell through the ice and spilled a whole pint of beer,
The water was ice cold,
And, I'm just getting too old,
I'd prefer "Summerfest" 12 months of the year.
I fell through the ice and spilled a whole pint of beer,
The water was ice cold,
And, I'm just getting too old,
I'd prefer "Summerfest" 12 months of the year.
Labels:
BEER,
COLD,
ICE,
ICE FESTIVAL,
ICE FESTIVAL LIMERICK,
SUMMERFEST,
WINTER HUMOR
Monday, December 5, 2016
YETTI SPAGHETTI MEATBALLS: A MICHIGAN RECEIPE
Danny Dill was a real restaurateur,
He had found an angle; a meat lover’s lure,
Danny Dill hunted the Michigan Yetti,
Then, made Yetti meatballs for his spaghetti,
To Yetti clans Danny Dill was a Cur.
He had found an angle; a meat lover’s lure,
Danny Dill hunted the Michigan Yetti,
Then, made Yetti meatballs for his spaghetti,
To Yetti clans Danny Dill was a Cur.
Labels:
HUMOR NEWS NUTS,
HUMOR SATIRE,
OUTDOORS NEWS NUTS,
OUTDOR SATIRE,
YETI,
YETI MEATBALLS,
YETI ON THE MENUE,
YETI SPAGHETTI
I WAS WATCHING THE NORTHERN STAR
I was watching the northern star,
Unfortunately, I was driving my car,
I hit some black ice,
My car spun round thrice,
I ended up in the same lane at par.
Unfortunately, I was driving my car,
I hit some black ice,
My car spun round thrice,
I ended up in the same lane at par.
Labels:
BLACK ICE,
DRIVER ATTENTION LIMERICK,
NORTHERN STAR
Sunday, December 4, 2016
IT'S THE TIME OF THE YEAR...
It's the time of the year when Santa goes "Ho,Ho",
It's also the time when my snow-blower won't blow,
I'm stuck in the house,
With the kids, dog and, spouse,
I'm just hoping that Santa will show.
It's also the time when my snow-blower won't blow,
I'm stuck in the house,
With the kids, dog and, spouse,
I'm just hoping that Santa will show.
Labels:
SANTA,
SANTA LIMERICK,
SNOW-BLOWER,
STUCK IN THE HOUSE,
WINTER
Saturday, December 3, 2016
THE WALNUT SILLY RHYME
My eyes grew tired,
My eyes went shut,
My shell was cracked,
I am a walnut,
I have no eyes,
At least none to see,
I'm a tasty treat,
Oh, woe is me.
My eyes went shut,
My shell was cracked,
I am a walnut,
I have no eyes,
At least none to see,
I'm a tasty treat,
Oh, woe is me.
Friday, December 2, 2016
BIG BUCK DEER HUNTING-HAIKU
Big buck deer hunting,
Cold, wet, slimy stumps, nose runs,
No see, no shoot, DRAT!
Monday, November 7, 2016
AN ELECTION OR TRICK OR TREAT
An election is like questioning Trick or Treat,
Maybe none of the candy is fit to eat,
And, no matter which kind you pick,
Chances are you'll get sick,
Fancy wrappers are covered with deceit.
Labels:
Deceitful Politicians,
Election,
Election Remorse,
Halloween Candy,
Sickened,
Trick or Treat
Sunday, November 6, 2016
THE END OF DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME
Well, today we've gained an extra hour,
That gives us time for all to shower,
So, relaxed starts the day,
Cause, Daylight Savings Time's gone away,
And, the extra sleep gives us each super power.
Sunday, October 30, 2016
FINANCIAL MARKETS ARE ALL IN THE TANK
Financial markets are all in the tank,
We have all those fraudsters to thank,
Of course, I'm not too bold,
I sold off and bought gold,
And, burned through all my cash in the bank.
We have all those fraudsters to thank,
Of course, I'm not too bold,
I sold off and bought gold,
And, burned through all my cash in the bank.
Friday, October 28, 2016
MY FISH WENT FLYING
I put my fish up for sale,
While it was still flopping around in the pail,
But, I didn't get a buyer,
Just one very high flyer,
An eagle stole my fish by the tail,
While it was still flopping around in the pail,
But, I didn't get a buyer,
Just one very high flyer,
An eagle stole my fish by the tail,
Labels:
eagle,
FISH,
Fish For Sale,
Fish In Pail,
fishing,
HUMOR,
LIMERICK
Tuesday, October 18, 2016
THE SPIDER ROYAL RIVALRY
Fly Biter was the spider king,
He knew so cause he had the royal ring,
But, he got caught in a web,
Spun by his big sister Deb,
Now, she claims to be queen with her bling.
He knew so cause he had the royal ring,
But, he got caught in a web,
Spun by his big sister Deb,
Now, she claims to be queen with her bling.
Wednesday, October 12, 2016
GRANDMA'S PORCELAIN RABBIT
My porcelain rabbit went to the floor,
It scattered pieces from the TV to the door,
The rabbit had been in grandma's old bookcase,
But, I think I'll not replace,
I'll use the money to buy a pizza, ...toppings four.
It scattered pieces from the TV to the door,
The rabbit had been in grandma's old bookcase,
But, I think I'll not replace,
I'll use the money to buy a pizza, ...toppings four.
Labels:
Art,
Broken Ceramics,
GRANDMA,
HUMOR,
Inherited Stuff,
LIMERICK,
Porcelain Rabbit
Wednesday, October 5, 2016
MY ROSES WERE NOT SO TOUGH
Although they survived the summer covered with blight,
I'm afraid all my roses got frozen last night,
I was so sure they were tough,
And, would survive the weather when rough,
But, my roses gave up to the cold with no fight.
I'm afraid all my roses got frozen last night,
I was so sure they were tough,
And, would survive the weather when rough,
But, my roses gave up to the cold with no fight.
Tuesday, October 4, 2016
THE LIMERICK OF THE NASTY TWEETER
When Ron reads tweets about him he gets really mad,
Because, the tweeters who tweet about him tweet him really bad,
But, Ron tweets tweets all the day,
And, has nasty things to say,
If Ron would stop tweeting so much I'd be glad.
Because, the tweeters who tweet about him tweet him really bad,
But, Ron tweets tweets all the day,
And, has nasty things to say,
If Ron would stop tweeting so much I'd be glad.
Labels:
HUMOR,
LIMERICKS,
NASTY TWEETER,
TWEETS
Sunday, October 2, 2016
TOTAL MICHIGAN SEASONS : 2.1
In Michigan you don't get much fall,
Fall is hardly a season at all,
Fall is just a small splinter,
Between summer and winter,
And, the spring season we don't get at all.
Fall is hardly a season at all,
Fall is just a small splinter,
Between summer and winter,
And, the spring season we don't get at all.
Labels:
FALL,
HUMOR,
LIMERICK,
Michigan Seasons,
Seasonal Change,
Spring,
SUMMER,
WINTER
Thursday, September 29, 2016
DRIED BLUEGILL FONDUE
I caught some fish with gills of blue,
I dried and dipped them in fondue,
But, they caused many moans,
Because they were full of bones,
And, their insides were all goo.
I dried and dipped them in fondue,
But, they caused many moans,
Because they were full of bones,
And, their insides were all goo.
Labels:
Bluegills,
Dried Fish,
FISH,
FISH BONES,
Fondue,
HUMOR,
LIMERICK,
Uncleaned Fish
Wednesday, September 14, 2016
THE MUFFLER (FROM RUST TO DUST)
While in my car I heard the worst darn sound,
When my muffler fell and hit the ground,
My muffler had melted to rust,
And, was now mostly just dust,
At least that's all that I found.
When my muffler fell and hit the ground,
My muffler had melted to rust,
And, was now mostly just dust,
At least that's all that I found.
Thursday, September 8, 2016
GETTING A CLEAR TV SIGNAL
My cable picture is pixeled,
My dish picture's all haze,
My antennae big booster,
Boosted my TV with a blaze,
Now, after all of my trouble,
My house lies out in burnt rubble,
It’s a reality show that my neighbors may gaze.
Labels:
ANTENNAE TV,
cable TV,
DISH TV,
house fire,
HUMOR,
irony,
poem,
tv
Saturday, September 3, 2016
HOT APPS AND MY BANJO CAN'T PLAY
My fingers got blown off today,
Now, my banjo I clearly can't play,
I blame my cell phone,
Which was explosion prone,
Because, of hot apps downloaded in May.
Now, my banjo I clearly can't play,
I blame my cell phone,
Which was explosion prone,
Because, of hot apps downloaded in May.
Labels:
Apps,
cell phone,
Cell Phone Applications,
Cell Phone Dangers,
Hot Apps,
HUMOR,
LIMERICK,
UKULELE
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