COURTING THE TINKER OVER A POT HOLE

I needed my pot fixed, so I could have some stew with my port,15

So, I went to see the great tinker; he was my dead, last resort,16

Tinker patched my holed pot,

Tinker charged me a lot,

When I refused to pay, the great tinker, took me to tinker pot court.17

BEN WENT OUT HUNTING DEER

Ben went out hunting for deer,

He just had a sharp stick for a spear,

Ben found a ten point buck,

But Ben had no luck,

His spear failed, and he got pierced in his ear. 

I NAILED TWO BOARDS TOGETHER

I nailed two boards together, but methinks those boards I should have screwed,

I did not have screws or a screwdriver, so I hammered and nailed, so crude,

Now the weather is getting bad,

My boards are loosening, so sad,

Soon my shack will blow away, and to the weather gods, I'll be nude.

FEE-FI-FO-FOOP, I SMELL PORCH PIRATE SOUP

There was a little porch pirate who lived in the bushes near my stoop,

I knew he was living there, because I could smell his soup,

Every single day,

He'd steal my packages away,

Even my lawn mower, and my retro hula hoop.