SPACE ALIENS ARE WECOMED IF THEY DON'T CROP-CIRCLE

I beat my swords into ploughshares  but, kept a few spears,

For fear space aliens might crop-circle my ears,

I figure my pointy sticks,

Shows the aliens were not hicks,

So, they'll leave my crops alone and buy some pizzas and beers.

MY DROOLING DOBERMAN AND I

My doberman is really cruel,
He stands over my pizza to drool,
He smiles with no care,
And, that I can't bare,
Just wait until his license renewal.

PIZZA FACE AND AUNT JEN GETS DEVORCED

Polly was a pizza, and had no time for life,

She had a pretty pizza face, until it touched the knife,

Cut into pie pieces,

Fed to nephews and nieces,

For aunt Jen celebrated divorce, from her cheating wife.

PIZZA MAN LIMERICK

Pizza Man works really hard for his tips,
If he gets none he will puff out his lips,
So, get out some bucks,
You tight old dumb clucks,
Or, you'll receive Pizza Man's finger flips.

There was a guy they called Pizza Man,
He made deep dish pizza in a pan,
He delivered them too,
In his van painted blue,
When his van broke down then, he ran.

In my town Pizza Man was a star,
If he was coming you'd stop your car,
He had the right of way,
So, you had to obey,
For Pizza Man must travel afar.

PIZZA GONE BAD

The pizza I had delivered, tasted like feet,👣

It was pricy, and I still had to eat,💸🍕🍕

So I shared with a friend,👯

Turned an enemy by the end,😠

We both had our stomachs pumped, now we're both beat.🚑🏨💤

MY SPACECRAFT RAN INTO A STAR

My Spacecraft by L. Brandt

My spacecraft ran into a star,
Now, my spacecraft will not go,
And, I did not pay my insurance bill,
So, I cannot get a tow,

I'm now stranded way out in deep space,
My oxygen is running low,
No one answers calls to my place,
And, I can't reach my good friend Joe,

I'd like to order pizza,
But, there's limits on my doe,
Alone and hungry in deep space,
There are no limits on my woe. 

BLACK FRIDAY COMES ONLY ONCE A YEAR

Black Friday comes only once a year,
The sales are great when money is dear,
The stores slash the price,
Up to 70% which is nice,
That leaves more money for pizza and beer.