I MARRIED A NINJA NAMED ROSE

I married a ninja named rose,
In various positions she’d pose,
I checked out a girl named Clare,
And, to my demise and despair,
I found out how far Rosey throws.

THE IDES OF MARCH COME ONCE AGAIN

The Ides of March come once again, 

My stored foods have gone bad, there's nothing for din,

My apples are soggy,

My canned foods are all foggy,

My taters sprout out of their bin.

 

THE KING OF COLORS

The King of Colors presents,

To his colorless, subjugated peasants,

His colorful wealth,

That he hides not with stealth,

Like peacocks more than pheasants.

LARRY AND THE RAT TRAP

A rodent named Larry sure liked his cheese,
He had no manners and never said please,
He saw a really big chunk,
Just started eating, “Kerplunk!”
The rat trap got old Larry with ease.

JIM THE RATTLESNAKE

There was a rattlesnake named Jim,
He would bite you on a whim,
But, along came a bear,
That Jim did not scare,
Now in heaven Jim hisses his hymn.

Jim the rattlesnake was awfully mean,
He bit everything that he had seen,
But, from above,
Jim fell in love,
With a rattlesnake named Darlene.