I ran over my pogo-stick with my old car,
Now I can't pogo, jump high or jump far,
So, I just thought it was best,
To lay my pogo to rest,
Some thought my pogo stick funeral bizarre.
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Sunday, November 30, 2014
THE END OF MY POGO-STICK
Thursday, November 27, 2014
MY PET BAT GAVE ME RABIES
I had a giant bat,
That lived underneath my sink,
It's body was pitch black,
But, it's tongue was a bright pink,
It liked to lick my forehead,
And bite me on the nose,
And, when I laid down to sleep at night,
It would nibble on my toes,
I got use to my big bat,
It was like he was a pet,
He was not a flying rat,
But, a friend that I had met,
So, I was not very happy,
When my pet bat flew away,
I then came down with rabies and,
Wished I could make that big bat pay.
That lived underneath my sink,
It's body was pitch black,
But, it's tongue was a bright pink,
It liked to lick my forehead,
And bite me on the nose,
And, when I laid down to sleep at night,
It would nibble on my toes,
I got use to my big bat,
It was like he was a pet,
He was not a flying rat,
But, a friend that I had met,
So, I was not very happy,
When my pet bat flew away,
I then came down with rabies and,
Wished I could make that big bat pay.
Labels:
bat humor,
bat poem,
bat satire,
pet bat,
rabies
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
I WENT DEER HUNTING WITH A SLINGSHOT LIMERICK
I went deer hunting with just a slingshot,
My luck was real good, really not,
The shot bounced off of the deer,
Got lodged in my ear,
And, there it must stay till I rot.
My luck was real good, really not,
The shot bounced off of the deer,
Got lodged in my ear,
And, there it must stay till I rot.
Labels:
DEER HUNTING,
HUMOR,
hunting skills,
LIMERICK,
slingshot
Friday, November 14, 2014
I'M NOT READY FOR DEAR HUNTING THIS YEAR
I'm not ready for dear hunting this year,
I have the wrong kind of ammo it would appear,
For some doe I won't trifle,
So, I bought buckshot for my riffle,
And, the fit is not really clear.
I have the wrong kind of ammo it would appear,
For some doe I won't trifle,
So, I bought buckshot for my riffle,
And, the fit is not really clear.
Labels:
ammo,
buckshot,
dear hunting,
dear hunting season,
HUMOR,
HUNTING LIMERICK,
riffle
Tuesday, November 4, 2014
IT'S HARD TO VOTE WHEN YOU'RE SOBRE
I was lectured a patriotic quote
On how I must go out and vote,
But, I couldn't check any box,
For I shook with detox,
And, my flask was in my other coat.
On how I must go out and vote,
But, I couldn't check any box,
For I shook with detox,
And, my flask was in my other coat.
Labels:
detox,
HUMOR,
limerick voting,
patriotic duty,
SATIRE
Monday, November 3, 2014
MY ELECTION DAY CHOICES LIMERICK
On election day I just could not choose,
Whoever won meant that I would then lose,
So, I wrote in "Burgers and Fries."
For food tells no lies,
Except, for judges I voted for "Booze."
Whoever won meant that I would then lose,
So, I wrote in "Burgers and Fries."
For food tells no lies,
Except, for judges I voted for "Booze."
Labels:
election choices,
election day,
HUMOR,
LIMERICK,
SATIRE,
write-in candidates
Sunday, November 2, 2014
ON ELECTION DAY
On election day I din't capitulate,
And, vote for any names approved by the state,
So, I wrote my own in,
Oh wow, what a sin,
I'll be in prison until 3008.
And, vote for any names approved by the state,
So, I wrote my own in,
Oh wow, what a sin,
I'll be in prison until 3008.
Labels:
government approved candidates,
HUMOR,
LIMERICK,
limited candidates,
SATIRE,
voter frustration,
voting,
write-in candidate
Saturday, November 1, 2014
JOHN'S JOB INTERVIEW
John could not find any socks that matched at all,
He ripped his pants and stained his shirt at the mall,
He knew his job interview,
Went completely phew,
When, the interviewer said "I won't call".
He ripped his pants and stained his shirt at the mall,
He knew his job interview,
Went completely phew,
When, the interviewer said "I won't call".
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