GREENING UP THE GRASS LIMERICK

I just love to green up my grass,
I won't let an opportunity pass,
So, I doubled up on the fert,
Burned my lawn down to dirt,
Now my yard looks lacking in class.

A DAY ON THE LAWN

My riding mower got stuck in a rut,
My push mower wouldn't even put-put,
 My weed whacker rolled over with a wheeze,
The only thing it whacked were my arthritic knees.