SKILLS VS. BILLS

I went to a school to get me some skills,

But, the school just took all of my one dollar bills,

Now, it's worse than before,

I am even more poor,

And, can't afford my prescribed psycho pills.  

THE PONTOON VIKING

On my pontoon boat I went raiding with Vikings,

We plundered Russia, and England and France,

Now to the rough life I've taken the likings,

I drink mead with the vikings and dance,

My pontoon boat goes a bit faster,

Than the viking ships that are rowed across the seas,

But  sometimes I fear a disaster,

When I can't find my one set of keys,

We all get a share of the plunder,

But I'm never amongst the first ones on the shore,

Those that are receive spears, arrows then, hear thunder,

When, they awake in Valhalla with Thor,   

Of course my income is not very steady,

In truth, my pickings have always been lame,

But I'm keeping my pontoon gassed and ready,

To rejoin the viking plunderers' game.

 

 

THE SPIDER ROYAL RIVALRY

Vanderbilt was the spider king,
He knew so cause he had the royal ring,
But, he got caught in a web,
Spun by his big sister Deb,
Now, she claims to be queen with her bling.