THERE WAS A GIRL FROM MIDLAND

There was a girl from the Midland mores,
She liked doing dishes and scrubbing floors,
She would work half a day,
She would work for no pay,
Good old mom did most of my chores.

I KNEW A LEPRECHAUN WHOSE NAME WAS PHIL

I knew a leprechaun whose name was Phil,
He liked to eat sour pickles and dill,
He ate so many one day,
He tuned green like the bay,
You could not see him on a green grassy hill.

Phil the leprechaun had a pot of gold,
He stood and guarded it and acted bold,
Then, along came a snake,
And, Phil started to shake,
Then, Phil ran off to parts yet untold.

LEPRECHUANS IN CLARE MICHIGAN

Leprechauns live in the county of Clare,
In Clare there are leprechauns everywhere,
They run the hotels,
And ring the church bells,
And, green is the color they share.

I went to the wildest county fair,
In the Michigan county of Clare,
There were leprechauns all over,
They were dancing in the clover,
But, I didn't find a pot of gold there.

A LEPRECHAUN NAMED SUE

There was a leprechaun named Sue,
Her hair was red, her eyes were blue,
A man from the city,
Thought she was real pretty,
So, he married her and moved to the Peru.

I knew a leprechaun named Jake,
He only ate banana cake,
If the cake looked nice,
He’d pay any price,
Jake should have learned how to bake.

SHANNON WAS THE GIRL I LOVED

Shannon was the girl I loved,
I loved her through and ture,
But, when I told her of my love,
She said I don't love you.

She said I was a pervert freak,
She said I was a looser,
She said she saw my future clear,
I'd just end up a boozer.

Now once I was a millionaire,
I looked my Shannon up,
She lived with a drunkard in despair,
With eight kids and a pup.

MY GIRLFRIEND JANE

My girlfriend Jane was near sighted,
After glasses her eyesight was righted,
She took one look at me,
She said set me free,
For my love was now unrequited.