NED HAS HEAD PLUGS

It felt like the fall of mighty Rome,

When Ned lost all the hair on his dome,

At just age twenty-five,

Ned felt barely alive,

He had hair plugs, and scalp treatment foam.

BABY BOOMER + GEN X = LOVE

Benny loved joining in with the Baby Boomer scene,

He wore wild disco pants, and was disco lean,

Then he met a hot mama,

Full of Gen X, high drama,

They grew old together, with fat pants and Maybelline.  

GAMER HEART STOPPER

When I was young, I played video games, until I was sixty-seven,

My heart stopped, and I departed off to play, video games in heaven,

I was surprised, well, well, well,

I woke up where demons dwell,

But, I got to play with my dead gamer fans, Nancy, Clancy and Kevin.

GETTING OLD

Dark circles under the eyes,

Flabby bulges in the thighs,

Teeth with stains,

Big weight gains,

You turned 21, it's no surprise.

MY BIRTHDAY

Today is my birthday and I'm 104,🎂🍸

I often take naps in the line at the store,🏬

I forget where my chair is and just fall on the floor,🐀🐁

The mail I can't read so, my bills I ignore,📭

I can't remember who won the ballgame or the war,🤔❓

I don't get good rest because I wakeup when I snore,💤💤💤

I'm told that I don't remember much anymore,💩

My family's all ghosts and they tell me, I bore,👻

My saving is spent so, I'm incredibly poor,💸

It stinks to have birthdays at 104.🍸