AFTER DOOMSCROLLING, I GIVE UP

I went doomscrolling on all the internets, and boy, did I find doom,

I tried to find some good news, but on the internets, there was no room,

Killer rocks, toward our planet, fly,

Ice cream cone prices are too high,

A big explosion builds within planet earth, and soon we'll all go, Boom!

TIM IN LOVE

Every time Tim fell in love,💘💘💘 his love was unrequited,💔💔💔 

Though Tim's hurt gave him great misery😿😿😿💦💦💦,Tim's love was quite delighted,😁😁😁🐷🐷🐷

The loved💩💩💩, not love, is so cruel,😈😈😈

Heart breaker, then ridicule,😂😂😂👹👹👹👻👻👻🖕🖕🖕

Tim lives forever with misery, other's choices cannot be righted.😭😭😭🍺🍺🍺🍹🍹🍹🍸🍸🍸

PORCH PIRATES ARE REAL, AND THEY KNOW HOW TO STEAL

I caught a porch pirate stealing and he laughed and said, "Aye, Aye,"

Then he grabbed all my packages, and ran saying, "Bye, Bye,"

Then he got into his car,

Drove off to lands distant and far,

I then told all the family, and they went "Cry, Cry."

MONDAY THE 13TH

Monday the 13th and I'm out of luck,

No sleep so, my work day is in muck,

I guzzled coffee and got wired,

So much so, I got fired,

And, my car got painted by 12 seagulls and a duck.