I BOUGHT A TOYOTA CAR

I bought a Toyota Car,
I thought I would really go far,
I slammed on the brakes,
Found out they were fakes,
They scraped me up off of the tar.

THERE ONCE WAS A GIRL NAMED TAYLOR

There once was a girl named Taylor,

She went to college at Baylor,

But, when she went home,

It was too cold in Nome,

So then she ran off with a sailor.

THERE WAS A GREAT BIG FELLA-Limerick

There was a big farmer fella,
He married a gal named Stella,
They found a home with some charm,
They began a mushroom farm,
Raising mushrooms called portabella.

There once was a great big fella,
He married a gal named Ella,
But, he was already wed,
Ella chopped off his head,
The other widow's name is Stella.

THERE WAS A SQUIRREL THAT LIKED HIS NUTS-Limerick

There was a squirrel that liked his nuts,
He buried them in holes and ruts,
The squirrel was slow,
So when there was snow,
He starved because he was a putz.

I CREATED SUPER HUMANS, SO NOW WE'LL CONQUER SPACE

To give them the ability to travel through space,

I re-engineered the creatures, called the "human race",

They need little oxygen to survive,

At high radiation levels, they thrive,

Through skin they absorb moisture, any time, any place.

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THE MONSTER IN THE SWAMPY LAGOON

I went swimming in a swampy lagoon,
My only light was the light of the moon,
While swimming on my back,
I was a swamp monster's snack,
In his belly, it was colored maroon.

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THE SOCIAL MEDIA CLICK

I'm on social media, and I'll do anything for a cheap click,

I'll tell lies, twisting news about celebs, into stories that are sick,

To get my half of the pie,

Mama taught me how to lie

I get the click, but I'm sad I don't get bribes, to sway my victim pick.

THE END OF ALL THINGS

I see a little bird fluttering it's wings,

It lands upon a branch and then, it sings and sings,

Happy is the bird this day,

Unknown, it's future that's on the way,

Unseen, the hawk that nears and nears, will bring the end to things.

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DON'T HONK AT MY DONK

Almost all are riding a dumb donkey, because of the high price of car gas,

We've all had to adjust, slow down our life styles, and give the fast life a pass,

Because we've run out of dough,

We get around really slow,

Of course, the rich people, who can afford to use cars, honk their horns to harass.

THE LITTLE BEE NAMED BARRY LIMERICK

There was a little bee named Barry,
He couldn’t get a girlfriend ‘cause his legs were hairy,
So he tried to groom,
Shaved his legs zoom, zoom,
But, now his legs look ten times as scary.

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