LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

There's a monster outside my spaceship, and he is from cold, deep space, I think he wants to eat me, or maybe mess up real bad, my face,...

I went to Portugal to buy some stringy cheese, While I was there, I bought honey made by some bees, I ate some cooked, ground pork, Drank wi...

Four little chickens were swimming in the blue sea, One got a cramped leg, it drowned, then there were just three, When a monster swallowed ...

My mother was a desktop computer, from old Maine, My dad was a hospital catheter, from Tulane, They did not make a fuss, They got together o...

My cat is sleeping in the window, while we're visiting Southern France, She is staring at some butterflies, as the afternoon hours advan...

I went to Canada to pick delicious, sweet peas, I don't like Florida peas, because they make me sneeze, I popped over to Maine Met my gi...

I traveled to Mars, and there wasn't much scenery there, Just a sickly coconut tree and a small koala bear, No place good to eat, No one...

Adriatic the real nice Martian, ended his interplanetary roam, He settled down in Northern Michigan, in a quaint, double wide, mobile home, ...

Trina went to Canada, to buy herself some maple candy, Trina bought a Canada cap, for her dear, big sister, Sandy, Trina flew across the Mer...

I always go for ice cream cones to the Mancelona Mall, They pile chocolate ice cream high, at least half a foot tall, They dab on some pinki...

My gargoyle went out on the big lake, My very best, darn row boat, he did take, I called him, " come back home", He was headed tow...

I went to Canada to see what I could see, It's an amazing place, but way to cold for me, So I went to Cancun, For some sun, and some spo...

There was a mystery drone that landed on my trailer house, The drone crushed in the roof a bit, and caused an "eek!", from a mouse...

My lunar lander fell to the moon, and had a big, total crash, I didn't pay attention, I was ear mellowing, to Johnny Cash, On an alien w...

I walked all the way to Tranquility Base, There, a mean moon monster got into my face, Feeling real tough that day, I told him to run away, ...

I rode on a magic reindeer in the velvet sky, I stole the deer from Santa, at the North Pole Fish Fry, I rode the reindeer all night, Until ...

Yesterday, I rode upon the air in a big, old airplane, A Seattle destination, was my one goal, to obtain, The dang, old plane hit some torqu...

Because there was a pretty girl he wanted to woo, Donny moved abruptly to a town called Kalamazoo, He forgot his goldfish, His tan cat he ca...

Mars, the dead red planet, is real dusty, It makes my white spaceship, look all rusty, Mars is far and away, A place I will not stay, I'...

I bought a little motorbike, so I could journey into town, The flying bugs splat me in the face, and that makes me have a frown, In town, my...