LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

I opened my refrigerator, and maggots were eating my beef roast, J wondered how the maggots tasted, so I ate some on my buttered toast, They...

I spent a lifetime making sandwiches, dripping with grease, I will never find in my demise, an eternal peace, I invented the heart flopper, ...

There once was an iconic, little blogger who could, He often made videos about carving craft wood, Then he'd slice up some ham, And fry ...

My pacemaker picked up the heart pace, So I stayed part of the human race, I could no longer eat, Tasty, fatty, salt meat, And that was a bo...

Don eats four fruits and a vegetable each day, Donny keeps his bowels cleared out, that simple way, French Fries and buttered toast, Don lik...

Because Bobby only ate food that came in tins, Bobby was deficient in many vitamins, He had hunger for pork pie, He never knew exactly why, ...

I had some fun juice that tasted so fine, No after affect like banana wine, I drank it for my dinner, It earned title of winner, I think dad...

Benny brought home to his wife some cheap crabs, The crabs were just little dribbles and dabs, They came in a can, Fried up well with Spam, ...

I'm having the fruit cocktail with those little sweet red cherries, It tastes even better with a few scrumptious blueberries, Then I add...

I had me some eggs with runny yolk, Washed them down with Diet Coke, Ate 2 lbs of salt, had a stroke, My driver's license got a revoke, ...

I made a holiday cheese-ball without cheese, Because, dairy makes my kinfolk wheeze, But, the sawdust and dust, Gave my cheese-ball a crust,...