LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

My little tame rat, named Alger, was always chewing flowers, The flowers,were non-lethal, but they made him poop for hours, Then, 3 times ev...

My buddy ate two pounds of tasty, dried plum, I told my buddy, he should only eat some, It was at the local town gym, My bud lost all foods,...

I pulled a pickle from a pickle jar, and it was hairy, I put the pickle back and went and picked a strawberry, Produce that is hairy, Is awf...

My love bunny is so crybaby sad, My love bunny ate scallops that were bad, The soft toilet seat, Is love bunny's retreat, When I can use...

I went to the office and went to the John, The porcelain was painted, I think it was Ron, Ron just left a big mess, Now he's chatting wi...

My garden potatoes were colored maroon, No one would eat them, except Mr. Raccoon, He ate them on a dare, Then messed his underwear, He sat ...

Berries make most people happy, They turn fossilized bowels into bowels so sappy, And, although it's not fair When TP is rare, In their ...

Sammy was a too loose goose; too loose to trek, Sammy started up a hill and then said, "to heck" Sammy had to way backtrack, To th...

Peter Pig was ground into sample sausages, down the street at Vinny's Store, The customers sampled Peter Pig, until Peter was no more, T...

This be the tale of Mr. and Mrs. Trotter, They liked eating raw oysters and otter, They both spent much time on the potter, They'd flush...

I bought my family a big piece of beef, Didn't know it would bring them constipation relief, They used the stocks of toilet paper, Paint...

I served some oysters that were tainted, Result, my toilets my kinfolk painted, Then, as my home filled with vapors, I had to go buy toilet ...

Donny loved to gather money, It was the only way he could find a honey, For, he had no hair, Bad underwear, And, down his leg dripped someth...