LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

I shaved and dressed up to visit my dear, girl Pansy, in the park, Pansy works there at a small hotdog stand, long hours, and after dark, Sh...

My bestest friend at work, my coworker, Jerry lost his mathematics job, The company replaced him with a newborn AI, energy drinking slob, I ...

Jimmy got a job as a taxi driver, after being fired from the city bus, Jimmy grossed out all his cab fares, because he was always popping pi...

There was a constant blogger, who blogged about preparing his every meal, He thought if he blogged his meal details, he'd receive lots o...

This sad morning, my old rusty, purple pickup would not start, My vehicle turned over once, then the engine blew apart, I was so late for my...

In the kingdom of the kind, everyone at my work, still hates me, People dine with friends after work, I dine alone on popcorn and ghee, In t...

Randy's beard was too short, so they sent him away, To the tribe of short beards, who work with the clay, Randy painted clay pots, With ...

I put pickles with my dill, Which is a real, common fill, Sour, extra sharp, Like a big toothed carp, Lunch for my job at the mill.

I pick up many of the biggest, toughest sticks, I pick up sticks under trees with bark hard like bricks, Big hard sticks make big hot fire, ...

Last night, I left my clothes on the bedroom floor, and they loaded up with bugs, This morning, I spread the bugs to the family, when I gave...

I spent extra time at the office, but I did not get any extra pay, I was told to spend extra time at the office, or I'd be fired, next d...

My neighbor's been living on castor beans, for about, the last couple of years, He's had the chocolate, backdoor trots, as attested ...

Apple Fritters Monday is how the usual morning, work week starts, Apple fritters are sweet and greasy, full of sour, fruity tart, tarts, Fri...

Four dudes, sitting by some flames at the beach, were eating sweet corn, After fire toasting, they used butter and salt, to adorn, It was co...

I received an email today, and it bid me goodbye, It said that I got termed by the corporations AI, I called a family meeting, Made sure all...

When starting out and leaving home, whether you're a Tina or a Tommy, You must begin looking for a rich, sugar daddy or sugar mommy, The...

My old snowblower went on the fritz, All its parts blew out in little bits, When my blower wouldn't blow, I shoveled the darn snow, I sh...

I told my boss, I was living in a simulation, To heal and get real, I needed a nice long vacation, He gave neither a laugh, nor smile, Told ...

Uncle Lee scraped up all the gum, that people had chewed, People left gum all over, and in places, so rude, But, it gave Lee a paying job, T...

To work, I wore my brand new paisley suit, That very day, my boss gave me the boot, He said never come back, It was a permanent sack, "...