LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

Trina boarded the Christmas train to the big town of Kalamazoo, Once there, Trina went Christmas thrifting, buying cheap trinkets that were ...

I went to buy some fresh, lean beef, but the price was just too high, I went to buy some deli ham, but the pig price made me cry. I wanted t...

I was hungry for peaches, so I went to the grocery store, The store didn't have any peaches, because they were needed for war, I did not...

I went to the local grocery store, and bought a markdown, specialty drink, It was full of caffeine, and tasted like a chemical from under th...

I went to the local grocery store, and I bought some greens, I bought some pork chop pork meat as a treat, and dish soap that cleans, I boug...

It got so dog gone cold, my pigs all froze, I sold them all before, the market close, Just a pound and a pee, Was the price they gave me, En...

I slow rode my crooked broomstick to the store,  I'm a witch, who likes to sweep the floor, I try the ripe, fresh fruit, And, vegetable ...

In the Michigan city, called Battle Creek, I went to a thrift store and bought an antique, A cute porcelain bear, With ginger colored hair, ...

I walked into the butcher shop, and found a dire werewolf, lurking the store, He had eaten all the butchers and clerks, and the old guy who ...

T. P. Taylor bought some screaming, pretty blue shoes,  It was important stuff, was on the nightly news, The shoes were from the mall, They ...

I went buying trinkets with my little sister Sue, We could have bought a car with all the money we blew, We stopped for burgers and fries, I...

I went to the dollar store, and bought some trinkets, on sale. Ten little tin milk maidens, each carrying a tin pail, I took my trinkets hom...

Santa has many presents to get, and Tuesday is Christmas Day, So Santa went down to the mall, and quickly loaded up his sleigh, This year Sa...

I only spent $4.00 for tuna, and it got me ten cans, Better Black Friday deal, than when I bought nine sets of fry pans, When poverty is in ...

I decided to buy a new front door, But, it's too far to the nearest door store, I bought a door through the mail, It was delivered by sn...

I went down the road to the store, to get me some soy, I found lots of products, making me one happy boy, I found soy that was gooey, And so...

I am the Red Dragon and I like to roar, I got to eat people, nothing good at the store, I tried some cheese, But it made me sneeze, It's...

Mabel had no Maybelline, Even though, she had washed up clean, With her friend Loren, They went out to buy corn, Couldn't buy steaks; th...

I bought a box of trinkets, cheap, I bought them from a a trinkets creep, His voice was all nasal, His breath smelled of witch hazel, He end...

Jenny liked to shop with great thrift, She spent just a penny for a gift, But, on gifts she received, She really got peeved, Under ten b...