LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

I went to the Symphony to hear me some Brahms, When I get really stressed out, the Brahms music calms, But, as the Valkyries roared, My bloo...

Ferris played masterfully, an ancient instrument, called the harpsichord, The elegant music was comforting, enchanting; a good soul's re...

I took some time to write some trumpet etudes, They are used for practice by trumpeter dudes, Separating men from boys, They sounded like no...

I knew a banjo player named Clay, And, boy could that hillbilly play, From Mozart to Bach, From Bluegrass to rock, His music had somethi...

I loved playing my dad's trumpet, and hoped a musician, I could one day, be, When dad died, we moved to grandma's house, and she sai...

My beautiful, brand new sailboat was seven meters long, I named her after a punk band, The Seven Meters Song, Because of bourbon and tea, I ...

I played a trumpet solo at a theatre in Western Maine, No audience showed up, so I felt intense, rejection pain, The concert tickets were fr...

I rocked out with tones on my electric guitar, In a jazz band that played at a hillbilly bar, We had a great base, His solos were ace, Our d...

I auditioned for the local orchestra, to play 1st chair trombone, I played a song called "Om Papa", with my bone muted by a mute c...

All I want for Christmas is a brand new flugelhorn, A truck ran over my old one, and made my horn unborn, I play my horn at the corner and g...

My cello was run over by a sports car, It's destroyed, now I won't be a cellist star, I thought it wouldn't get injured, So it w...

My trumpet notes are really flat, Since my brother beat it with a bat, He beat my oboe on the floor, And slammed my trombone in ma's tru...

Tory the 1st chair trumpeter, became quite unhinged, Because on Johann S. Bach, all night she super binged, Her lips were sore, Her tongue w...

I listened to the band, Rock Nesters, when I was a tween, rage boy, They were an aging birdie band, but they sang of true love and joy, The ...

A trumpet carillon played all through the night, They kept me awake which started a fight, But their brass horns hit true, Making me all ...

I stored away my trumpet, for the last thirteen odd years, I got it out to play, but it just made noise to my ears, My lips are all soft blu...

I directed the local, township choir, For each tunes perfection, I did aspire, If the notes sounded extremely bad, I sent email, with emoji,...

I was once a superstar, a regular one hit wonder, I really cranked and blew out the ear buds, with righteous thunder, I made eyeballs bleed,...

Jim the organ grinder, made tunes from his organ grinding pipes,  He sold bananas on the street corner, two different types, His noise broug...

My big brother was doomscrolling all day long, Brother was playing, some doomscrolling sad song, It was a real catchy tune, I started doomsc...