LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

I stored away my trumpet, for the last thirteen odd years, I got it out to play, but it just made noise to my ears, My lips are all soft blu...

The valves on my euphonium were turning, sort of a green, I hard polished to get those valves looking chic, metallic clean, The band leader ...

My favorite, little, straight flute, got pinched today, Someone evil grabbed it, and ran quickly away, It has a silver shine, Smells like me...

My orchestral instrument is the tin spoon, The guy sitting next chair, blows a wood bassoon, When spoon hits bassoon wood, The sound is most...

My glass Pan flute fell onto the floor, It shattered, and would toot never more, I stepped above my class, Bought a flute, made from brass, ...

Phillip Sparkle played some old giddy, show tunes, On his brand new set of silver plated spoons, He played most of the day, Till sunshine we...

Benny took my pretty trumpet, and dropped it on the floor, Then, Benny took my trumpet, and nailed it to the  backdoor, Benny gets so very m...

I decided to write etudes, that were fun and fancy, I did it for the trumpet, for my students Glen and Clancy,  The etudes made them play re...

Often Harry would play in concert his sweet kazoo,  Then he bought a nice metal flute, and it was brand new, Then he bought a clarinet, Foun...

I heard Mozart played on a didgeridoo, It was something different, something quite new, I heard The Magic Flute, On a doo, not a toot, The d...

It seemed like for my old cornet, all the notes did melt, For steaming hot was parade day, and that my cornet felt, My lips got drip, dry pa...

My entire universe consists of strings, I put strings on fiddles and banjos and things, I run string for cloths lines, I string tie-up grape...

I had a hot toasted pastry for my meal, It burnt my lips and made them peel, I saw Santa today, My burnt lips could not say, All I want is a...

Summer starts in the month of June, Not aligned with the full moon, Somehow that seems quite out of tune, Like when Jen plays trumpet, after...