LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

I have been a grave robber all of my adult life, It is an intimate thing, I do with my sweet wife, It's our family biz, Fills us with Ri...

I bought some red roses, for my best mate, Allen Ron, He lies out in the graveyard, next to his brother, Jon, They were quite a bro pair, Bo...

I heard some movement underground, out amongst the rows of graves, I saw hands pierce the wet earth, as the dead left their coffin caves, I ...

My wonderful, gentle, tender foot, Worked long shifts on chimneys, clearing soot, On the roof one day, He slid fast away, He now feeds a flo...

My dearest friend in the world, the hound, he died, The ancient woodland fairies, they cried and cried, I put my hound in the hole, Said ...

My hound now rests down deep in his hole, In the earth with the worm and the mole, I found a gravestone, That looks like a bone, I also left...

When Inky my pet octopus died, His friend Boris, the bear cried and cried Down my new toilet bowel, Went Inky's remains and soul, To the...

I sat on top of a tombstone, While licking my ice cream cone, The cone came from a odd host, It was the graveyard's  top ghost, And,...

Dan's Doctoral Thesis wss widely read, Dan proposed alcohol made little beasties go dead, Old Dan was a taker, not a giver, He took too ...

Pining for a new companion, Overseas I took a fly, Rammed a mountain; fell into a canyon, No one but I, didn't burn and die, Hugs I had ...