LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

I climbed up a sand dune mountain, too early in the spring, My bare feet went numb, and my bare fingers, ached with a sting, A T and shorts,...

It's Valentines Day, and no one got me roses, It is cold, and all I got was frozen toeses, I walked to the store, Got cold to the core, ...

Everyone in my town, has had severe frostbite of the nose, They all had their snoggers cut off, before their high school picture pose, Town ...

My old snowblower went on the fritz, All its parts blew out in little bits, When my blower wouldn't blow, I shoveled the darn snow, I sh...

I went to Canada to see what I could see, It's an amazing place, but way to cold for me, So I went to Cancun, For some sun, and some spo...

He-man Herman's nose was fat, red and full of gray stuffy, Around his little eyeballs, it was dank, dark and puffy, When Herman blew his...

We all hope that enough winter nuts, we have now, squirreled, As the dark, bleak drapes of winter, cover our new world, And, ode to the snow...

The cold was ever creeping, real near, Frosty toes made me quiver with fear, Woodstove was almost out, No wood lying about, That winter, fir...

I went to the woods, bought a quaint cabin, made out of snow, So in the summer, I would have a fancy place to go, On one hot summer day, I g...

Some long icicles fell off the barn roof, They knocked poor Jimmy off of his tall hoof, Jimmy needed a warm fire, So he lit up a truck tire,...

I could not pay my gas bill for months, because those funds I lack, I'm waiting for my kerosene heater to heat up my shack, In a couple ...

Seven little men walked way out upon the frozen lake, They had gone there to see how many fishies they could take, Three of the men, they dr...

I went outside for recess, and froze my nosey, Now, everyone says it's a red glowing rosey, When I walked school to home, I went on a to...

I went into the village to find me some heat, I found a huge box, lying free in the street, I just got moved in, And along comes my kin, I l...

I use to have some toes, But yesterday they froze, Along with the point of my nose, So to surgery I goes, Now for my toes and nose, I woes. ...

I wish Santa would bring me some cloths, Like some socks to thaw out my toes, Maybe a coat to stay warm, Boots to walk a snow storm, And som...

Such dreaded heat I can't remember, I'm using air conditioning in late September, But soon, ho, ho, ho, We'll be covered w...

I'm trying to get over my addiction to snow, It's hard to get over when it's everywhere that I go, I need an intervention, For m...

The roof on my home was felled by the snow, The roof completely collapsed, so I had nowhere to go, I could only weep, I had no castle ...