LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt

One pound of water and five pounds of milk fat, That is the composition of my dumb cat, His name is Old Sleepy Roger, He's an activity d...

What should I do, on a boring, old Saturday night? I could watch outside to see if the two tommys fight, They have the love smittens, Each w...

My fish tank was so full of guppies, they flopped onto the floor, They'd dry and my kitty would eat them, then looked around for more, T...

Because my house had loads of mice and rats, I decided to get myself some cats, They ate the mice today, Frightened the rats away, To deal w...

I painted my black and white cat, He was playing with a squeaky-toy rat, I sold the painting for big cash, So, I'm painting more mish...

There is a nasty boogieman who lives under my bed, He likes to chew on my old shoes and bop me in the head, I know he is a dirty stink...

There was a dog named Feelings, Feelings liked to roll around in the dirt, His master kept Feelings all penned up, Because he didn’t want...

My vegetable garden was never real green, It was mostly brown from the beet to the bean, But, I never got wiser, Used the same fertilizer...

I got pine tree juice all over my two feet, It's sticky and nasty and just can't be beat, I tried to use soap, But it gave me no ...

There was a virus going around and I didn't care,😽 I'm a cat and have nine lives to spare,😺 Then, the virus I got,🙀 And, ni...

My kitty had a squeaky toy, Shaped like a mouse it brought great joy, On the morn of each day, Squeaky mouse got such play, By afternoon...

In my garden there was a pile of scat, I first thought is was the work of my cat, Then, standing there was a yeti, Which made the pile se...